LATE BLOOMERS, GET MOTIVATED...

(To better understand what I mean about motivation, please refer to the article posted on 7/14/05.)

As was stated in the last article about how the Late Bloomer should begin his journey to “bloome-dom”, he must start small. But even this could be a challenge for the Late Bloomer. Motivation is the key to overcoming this challenge.

Regarding motivation, sometimes a Late Bloomer has had an epiphany. He woke up one morning and shouts, “I have ventured deep into my soul and find that, yea, verily motivation now dwells within my depths and forms the very central core of my being!”
I believe it safe to say that, for most of us, this is not the case. Most of us need some kind of external motivator. If you are the rare person about whom I spoke a second ago, feel free to skip the rest of this article and wait with bated breath for the next one. However, the other 99% come with me.

I trust that, because you are a Late Bloomer, you have always possessed adequate social skills (as was explained in the article posted on 7/20/05). That being said, it is safe to assume that you have friends; not just coworkers; not just casual acquaintances; not just neighbors to whom you wave and say “Good morning” as you both get in your cars to live your separate days. I am talking about friends who would be willing to help you out if you ask them. (I just heard about 100 guys scream from within, “I can’t do that! That would be like asking for help or something.” Yeah. That’s the point. You are a Late Bloomer because you didn’t get any motivation earlier in life, remember? It was before you found out that our society says it is shameful for a guy to ask for help with character issues. I have a question for you:

If society frowns upon a man who shows a bit of vulnerability, why is it then that you would help the friend who asks you for help? Are you not part of society? Do you not make up a small portion of this thinking world? The fact is, guys are willing to help one another because we care about and are loyal to one another. Those who say differently are either blinded by what is perceived as a societal norm, or just flat lying, both to themselves and to others.

Ok. So now you’re ready to ask for help. You are ready to receive external motivation. But what can this friend do for you that will help you be motivated? Glad you asked.

Did you know that there is such a thing as a personal coach? A very dear friend is a personal coach. I don’t know what she gets paid (nor is my business) but it is her business to help others accomplish tasks and achieve goals. I am asking you to ask a friend if they will help you by being your personal coach, henceforth referred to as your motivator. It could be your spouse, one of your friends, a family member; anyone who you feel is going to help you stick to your plan. Oh! Did I say plan? That just happens to bring me to my next point. Make a plan.

When a Late Bloomer looks at a task he can be intimidated by the thought of actually finishing it. There is occasionally the occurrence when he could go head-strong into a task because it looks like fun or it’s something he really wants to do. This may actually happen quite often. But if a Late Bloomer hits the wall before he has even decided to take on a task, then the task has to become less intimidating; hence, the plan.

Let me use the book analogy from the previous article.

If I think about finishing “Shut Up And Sing”, it seems a bit intimidating. Not so intimidating that I don’t believe I can do it; but intimidating enough that I won’t go full throttle into it. (FYI: this is not because it is not a good book. It is a great book, filled with just the kind of humor, sarcasm, and politics I enjoy.) So, I need a plan. First, I should find out how many pages left to finish it. Then I set a goal for when the book should be completed. Divide the number of pages by the number of days until the goal and commit to reading that many pages per day.

There you have it; a plan to start a not-too-simple but not-too-challenging task. It’s all really easy, except for that “commit” part. That infers something beyond just getting started. Enter: the motivator. Make it known to your motivator what your goal is and your plan to accomplish it. Your motivator will be able to help push you through the wall that you will inevitably hit once you get under way. He will help you through that paper wall and give you a bit of a push. And when you cross the finish line of your task, don’t forget to thank him for helping build your character.